Rage Eternal

I've always thought that I had made it; well, at least to some degree, I thought I had been lucky this lifetime and perhaps, just maybe, I was just going to be that person that would be graced with a 'fairy tale' story. I never really believed in it before, but maybe if I just let myself believe, it would exist. It would be real.

After a decade or so, how can I not believe? After what we decided to do and grow, how can I not believe? I thought I saw the future, imperfect, but we would be there hand in hand with our legacy in between us... I thought for once that someone in my life was actually honest and true. Someone would be by my side until the end. I thought for sure that I wouldn't alone and I believed that someone can actually take me for who I am despite my faults, my past, and my constant lack of common sense at times.

I really did think that love existed and that I was saying those three words because I was 'blessed' with the notion of love.

I was a fool. And I was wrong.

People don't follow through on their promises and their vows. People change ... find other things to make them happy... find their set of happiness and expect you to just live with it. People don't want to make things work or change things for the better... they want me to change and try and be the one to make it better while they sit there and bask in their own self worth and their pride. People aren't real. People are false.

People do not  care. You didn't care as much as you did. Because just like everyone else I have met... you try and point out my faults and when yours are laid on the table, you simply try and uphold your self righteous and heroic grounds and leave me to filter and sort out the rest. You've already found your solace way before you decided 'it's over'.

You are the same as everyone else.

But... for the sake of our legacy, I can only smile and go through the days in 'peace'. All this rage, this sorrow... this will be directed in a different way when the lifetime is right.

Everyone gets theirs. Everyone. Heroes. Villains. EVERYONE.

My rage will come next lifetime and you have the worst to take. Tell me, when penance stares at you in the eyes, will you continue to blabber with the same self righteous words? Will you continue to do what everyone does and forget the wrongs you've done?

Do and say what you will. Karma will come at you.