Hhhmmm.

"Clarity".

And certain change and 'Leave of Absence' are coming to an end for sure. It's quite peculiar how things say things at times. 

"The Forgotten"

Sentiments.

Dreams. Tainted.

I searched for you, you know. I haven't scrutinized YOUR existence in some time because I was left with nothing. Well, a few walls and some silence later and I guess I did have SOMETHING to go by. You'll be so proud of me though. I found another 'one'. At first I thought it was mirrors... a resemblance and someone of the same. Not so much. Different. Far too enamoring. But it is without its disdains. A doubting sense that you have taught me and you have armed me with. You and the many others in my past. My past. Your little one is beautiful. The eyes tell a story far too magnificent for some of us to understand. I know what that means now... I wish you and I could share the similar stories of our legacies. But alas, it wasn't meant to be.

Forgotten? Far from it. You say your story was about a Forgotten, but I beg to differ. My story IS the Forgotten. Because no matter what, I still have some semblance of sentiments for something that was always a magic a mirror. One sided. I saw myself and you saw through me.

Sentiments.

Dreams. Tainted.

Thank. You. For. The. Lessons. Learned.

"Deception"

Currently pondering if I was led astray the whole entire time. Often wondering why there was even that slight disdain in the first place.

Now I think I have found a sort of balance within that. I believe I found something worth noting.

I need some Clarity, otherwise, this will be "IT" for sure.

Tainted.Dreams

And there goes another night of that. Is it my doubts or is it premonitions like before? A warning of what is to be?

It transpires when I am not about. Hounded by the constant thought that perhaps it can all go astray...

What lies in truth and what is fallacy?

Dreams may never die but they can linger as haunting ghosts. 

"Wish"

There are times when the notion of 'Team' is a bit disruptive. Sometimes sentiments are forgotten and/or stepped on. 

Sometimes 'solo' is the best way to go and I wish I can find that notion again. Amidst the metaphorical pages, am I 'that' again? 

Or perhaps all of this is someone else's fault. 

I'm tired of having my dreams tainted. Perhaps I should succumb to destitution again.

The Opposition And The Pendulum.

There might've been a point in time where I could've been the one that looked at the cup half full. Unfortunately, not so. The notion perpetuates. I am constantly at war with myself.

"The Battle Within" Is a never ending tirade against who I am. It is a climbing mark of those who came before me. People I have read and met. People who will remain just and some who were just shadows of what true honor may be. 

Perhaps I found something that would give me the biggest tool to cut through the stagnancy of an art I am enamored, adept, and told by many as someone who is capable. I loved that tool. One that keeps me sated. 

But in the end, are we all victims of a cruel fate? An unjustified end to something so new and fresh? 

What color of the spectrum do I abide by now?

Most time I am lost in translation but the answer is within my grasp; if I dare try and perceive it as I was told.

Almost

I'm serious. I'm almost done.

Just a few more.

Actually, one more whimsical blog in regards to a certain collection/s that I haven't delved into as often as I would like because of my recent(That word is used loosely, mind you) distaste for a particular genre as of late and the said collection has been part of my 'gang' way before I started blogging exuberantly.

But yes. The main news..

"ALMOST".

That is all.

A Moment of Silence.

Robin Sachs: Zaeed Massani

Rest in Peace to Robin Sachs. He voiced Zaeed Massani for the great game Mass Effect (2 and 3 to be exact). Though Zaeed wasn't entirely my favorite character to use despite him being a pretty crude and useful son of a gun, I must say that hearing this is a bit of a downer. With that said, I must offer my condolence and of course my gratitude for lending us your voice for one of the greatest games to ever cross the gaming world.

Standing So Close...

...Just a moment as I astutely read some of the writings on the confines of my own walls...

It was just a moment.

Perhaps the ink will spill for a while in the shade of ambivalence or perhaps in a way that would profoundly jest.

Was  I stern or was I merely just a fallacy?

I don't know. All I know is that the way I weave the words  I speak in the fiction I live is juggled by the mirror rhythm that reciprocates on the other side.

"That's Me In The Corner..."

Sometimes the best thing to do is to just take a few steps back. Elicit a means of exoneration in a different shade of red. I am after all just a pigment of HIS imagination. Not to be true but fictional. Bound by definition... And scarred by frivolous but cathartic words...

I need to sleep right now. I need rest....

But I don't want to take a few moments off.... But Have to. Should.

Could I?

The Gemini

This 'was' the month that brought me to a world that is now I consider as an inextricable part of me. Suffice to say, with the new 'skill' I have learned through a simple application, I have decided to revamp one of the 'faces' of someone I know through a fiction I live in.

To many more years then.

Darkness and Light

"I Try My Best to Satisfy..."

Beyond the Bonds that I Define... pass the other who chooses to endure... Within the confines of what liminality and fantasy was able to give... you were there. You and I were 'that'. I know the days have shifted and I know sometimes it may have seen that I have forgotten, but in the most gracious times that I am allotted the sense of nostalgia, I do still cherish and I honor it with all my heart.

We were once bound by the confines of darkness and light; one is the light and the other is the dark, one and the other, one cannot really be without the other. I guess now with how life has passed us by, my friend, we are no longer that definition... not light in the dark... but together... the rapport of day and night.

Don't ever disdain. While we may have walked a path that was on borrowed time, at least now, you and me can say that our time is no longer trespassing. It is an ordinance. It is clockwork. A pattern, a habit, something I look forward to. My friend. 7=)

"Canon"

The Bonds That Defines Us...

It started a year ago and pervaded through some days and nights. It was never perfect in regards to the positive vibes. It was never an infallible rapport; it is and always will be just between two human beings, and humans are known for their errors. But suffice to say, regardless of what endeavor we would cross, we always know the good times, we always know that behind each typed word and every emoticon expressed, we are just that, two people who knows how to read, love, and learn. =)

I am forever grateful. And I don't think (as I have redundantly pointed out) I have enough words to describe just how special this is.

One year since our beginning. =) To many more years.

"Seeing Red Again"

"The End"

When one door closes, another one opens.... and well, this is the new. Well, on the progress of becoming something that will be my place of solitude. As you can see, RED is the theme. Now from this angle, it may look a bit 'bloody mary' for lack of a better term, but the name of the said paint color is 'Heirloom Red', so it isn't as dark and dreary as one might surmise from this vantage point.

A bit brighter when light is about. Suffice to say, this room is going to be a bit on the whimsical side and of course concurring with my main color scheme. A long ways to go in this endeavor and at times could be encumbering to think about the amount of work I must put in, but hey, a Journey of a Thousand Steps starts with one, right?

So here's a shot to the little steps then!

"Solace"

Sometimes, in a world full of blood and stripped of hope...

We are all that they need to feel loved and cope....

We are the Testament. Those who deters malice. Those who cares. Despite everything, those of us who share our heart to them... they will remember always. They will know, always. We are more than their voice, we are their smiles, their happiness, Their SOLACE.

=)

For the Hope ...

And there are days that might not be the best testament of nirvana. Sometimes there are nights when things are go awry that we are ostracized from the concept of a good day... stripped of the feeling of a good night.

I can only HOPE that the best way about this is through the support that we have; through the network that we have called our group of solace.

Though we know that there are times that won't be the pinnacle of the remedy, but we can all concur that it is a source to help add on to perhaps a Better Tomorrow. For ALL of us.

So here's to Hoping.

For Auld Lang Syne. The New.

To reflect on the things that has happened this year....

A lot has happened... a Lot of Good. Some disdains. But for the most part, I think it could've been a whole lot more worse than it 'could've been better'.

So for my resolution:

I hope it's a step closer to my redemption... to my salvation.

I hope to live up to the upcoming responsibilities I am going to face this year.

I hope that those who depend on me can KEEP on depending on me.....


Well. Truth to be told. I am at a loss words. Happy New Years everyone!!!!

My Feeling Right Now...

Avarice.

It would be my sin in regards to everything that is going on... that is all...

I don't know if there is going to be a solution; if there would be a resolve.... Frankly...

I'm kind of afraid there won't be.

My Greed won't let me find one I guess.

But I decided on this leap of faith some time back and the road is closing in.

The gates are closing in.

So Soon.

The Morning of Christmas!

And later on today when I wake up a bit more, I'll have updates and such... One can fathom what they would contain, now right? Let's just put it this way, I'm enamored by everything I have.

Merry Christmas!

May the days be Merry and full of spirit for all of us.

Holidays are the times for family and for good spirits; Positive energy and all.

And of course for all the jovial things to come!

Merry Christmas!!!