"The Avatar"

It was about a month ago that I found out about a certain ordeal. I have coined the vehement feeling of 'doubt' as that ominous "Shadow". What I thought and felt was the biggest and the most painful thing I have to go through in "FL" is actually there; the whole entire time; sparse according to words that I am more than inclined to believe through trust and logic, but regardless of the fact, it *was* there.

Confrontation led to many forks in the road; the more obvious one, the one that is more than often insinuated is perhaps it is just that, we 'leave this shit behind' because it *is* what one must because it more ways than one it distorted a whole hell of a lot of trust, faith, and perhaps tainted something that I have seen as close to being infallible than most. But if I did say 'screw it' would it have been beneficial for anyone?

And yet here we are now. The fruit of labor is yet to be defined and what if I never found that road? What if I never did bother to confront the shadow? Was it worth it? Is the catalyst of the silence, the means to an end I have been searching for?

I've come to the conclusion that I care too much at times. Any 'logical' person would've stood by the face value and said 'screw it'. The logical person would've seen it in the eye, extracted all of the truths and perhaps further perpetuate that fallacies and deception are within every neck of the woods. Lost of sentiments, disappearances, and silence are indeed the most potent signs that it is just that, another tainted idea of 'friendship'. 

But logic has submerged itself within me; I am and will always be defined by the bonds that are intertwined. I may be the fool in some other end; I may be fighting a battle that is already lost, but in the end ... I'm here to let you know that It is fucking special to me; no one can assume otherwise. 

I'll be here. For as long as it is allowed of me. I refuse to believe that a second rated avatar is the destruction of a collected mind.